No parent ever wants to hear that their child has a disorder. Much less hear that their child has Autism. I will never forget the day when I listened to those words. I was overwhelmed with so many emotions! This week’s post is about a journey I never expected we would walk through. But we walk through having hope, peace, and love.
Journey before the diagnosis
Before I start talking about the day of the diagnosis, let’s kick off with the journey before the diagnosis. Before the diagnosis, life as a family was normal. Our son was hitting his milestones like any kid. Then, when he was getting ready to turn three, we started having concerns. We scheduled an appointment with his pediatrician. At that appointment, the question was asked, “Is your son becoming verbal?” He started to, but had regressed. From that appointment, we were referred to a neurologist for an evaluation. A week later, we received a call and got an appointment for March 4th. Leading up to the appointment, I was relieved that this evaluation would give us answers to the multiple questions we had. I wasn’t nervous about the appointment. I was more apprehensive about the drive to the appointment. The neurologist’s office was located in a college town and around other medical offices. This means there was going to be traffic.
The diagnosis day
The day had arrived to take our son for an evaluation. My husband got off early, so we met and started driving to the appointment. Going down the road, I still wasn’t thinking about the appointment. I was more focused on making it safely to the appointment. When we arrived on the premises, it looked like I’d be parking in a garage! Fun fact about me: parking garages terrify me! But once I found a spot and safely parked, we began making our way inside. When we were walking through the halls of the hospital, peace and a resistance came over me. Seeing the signs to pinpoint what location we needed to be at amazed me; there is a department for any medical need out there! When we arrived at the receptionist desk to check in, the office felt personal and comforting. I had the same feeling when I was in the NICU with our daughter. The office was calm, quiet, and peaceful!
We checked in and sat down long enough to notice the view before we were called back. We were directed into a room devoid of windows. The room included an exam table, a computer, and a printer, placed on a desk. Additionally, there were some toys in a room that my son didn’t seem interested in. He was more fascinated with the printer!
The evaluation started with an introduction outlining the purpose and process of the appointment. The next phase was the longest questionnaire that I have ever completed! However, throughout the assessment, I experienced a series of aha moments. As the evaluation was in process, what happened next was unexpected. My son turned off the lights in the room and placed his hands over his ears. He then proceeded to open the door and run down the hallway. Off I went running, whisked him up and brought him back into the room. The neurologist chuckled and said, “I’ve got all the information I need.” I would imagine so!
Presenting the diagnosis: Initial feelings
When the specialist gave the diagnosis, she didn’t comment on anything. The results were straightforward. Based on the evaluation, our son is on the third level of the Autism spectrum. The specialist said it more formally using medical terminology. After presenting the diagnosis formally, the tone of the conversation switched to casual. We were presented with resources, which meant we had support and were relieved. Was there a flood of emotions? Yes! I would be lying if I didn’t tell you I was overwhelmed. At the same time, relief washed over us; we didn’t have to worry anymore.
Understanding the diagnosis
After receiving the official diagnosis, I kept researching. Now, I was focused on putting that knowledge into action. At the time of the diagnosis, my understanding of autism had primarily been shaped by my self-diagnosis. It is now to help our son. Learning how he thinks. How he behaves. Learning to do parenthood on the spectrum! I have become a nerd when it comes to studying Neurodiversity!
Thinking about the future with my son being on the spectrum, I am not worried. He is still normal, and life is normal! His development may be different, and as we go along, we will make adjustments. We’re not in this alone- there is hope, support, and plenty of resources to help us through.
The Journey of the diagnosis
From the moment we received the diagnosis, I began building a support system for my son. I’ve connected with other families going through similar experiences, and we’ve also found an amazing network of specialists and educators. While we still face our share of challenges, we’ve also had some incredible wins. Our son has started saying words and phrases- every single one is a reason to celebrate!
Looking back and forward: Growth and Acceptance.
Since receiving the diagnosis a month ago, we’ve experienced significant growth as parents. I’ve also noticed progress in my son. I’m becoming more attuned to when his behavior stems from overstimulation, and I’ve learned to respond with patience, without feeling overwhelmed myself.
My view on neurodiversity has evolved since receiving the diagnosis. I’ve come to understand that being neurodiverse isn’t a flaw or something to fix. It is simply a different way of experiencing the world.
Conclusion: A message of hope
While the journey ahead may look different than I had imagined. My son’s diagnosis isn’t the end of a dream- it’s the beginning of a new deeper understanding of who he is and the incredible person he is becoming. Every day brings small victories, new insights, and moments of connection that remind us we are not alone. To any parent reading this who just received the same news: there is hope. There is community and there is love!